But is it mental illness? Is it just me or has the human race lost all sense of proportion when it comes to disappointment.
The other day I read an article on the net about a contestant on Britain’s Got Talent who is suing Simon Cowell because his comments on their performances during the show has effected their mental health. Now, I’m no expert on mental health issues. In my life time, I’ve been to some dark places, but have managed to grasp onto the tiniest glimmer of hope, and hang on for dear life, but as far as being disappointed when things don’t measure up to my expectations, I didn’t see that as effecting my mental health, just my pride.
Yes, disappointment does effect our mental wellbeing, but this is short lived. We are hurt, upset and mortified by the criticism we receive when we feel, we’ve done our very best. We cry because we feel we’ve let others down, after they have supported us, and especially ourselves. It can effect our confidence for quite a while afterwards, but sometimes our best isn’t good enough. In these moments, we need to revalidate our own opinions, on what we see as our best.
Rejection in any shape or form, whether we are chasing the dream job, a book deal, or a perfect relationship, sometimes can be tough because we don’t want to let go of the dream. The feeling of despair we are feeling isn’t a mental illness, no matter what we might think. Yes, it can play on our minds, shake us to our core. There is a saying about every dark cloud has a silver lining, and sometimes a little rain must fall before the sun will shine again. Our dreams can also be our own downfall.
Everyone has dreams, things they wish to achieve in their lifetime, but we have to keep them in perspective. If we go back to Simon Cowell and Britain’s got Talent. A show like that gives many people the opportunity to come out of the shadows, and stand centre stage to have their five minutes in the limelight. After having received such positive comments from the judges during the first couple of rounds, it’s understandable that it can be a huge disappointment, when the contestants start receiving negative comments.
To put it in perspective, it might be that the singer in question didn’t improve throughout the show, where the other contestants did. There’s always winners and losers in competitions. It’s a fact of life, we all suffer some sort of disappointment in our lifetime, but its down to how we handle that loss. The singer’s dreams might have been too big for her talents. Maybe, she wanted Simon’s support to achieve her dream to be the next big superstar, and now can’t let go. She doesn’t have to let go of her talent to sing, to entertain others, just to let go of Simon’s support. What about the thousands of other singers, and performers who have stood before the judges, and not made it. Will they sue him too?
Changing the perspective of your dream can be difficult, especially, if you have set your heart on just one aspect of it. I made sure I kept my own dream opened ended. I never set my heart on writing a bestseller, but on being published. It didn’t matter to me when I set off on my writing journey, how or when, just, eventually, I would be published. It was important for me to build my confidence first, ready to deal with the disappointments I knew I would receive.
We must all face the fact that things we dream of won’t always go in our favour. Life will slap us hard, when we least expect it. The important thing is to try, try and try again. Or, at least, alter your perspective, and then try again.
Stay Positive and Move Forward.
Thank you for dropping by for a chat.